


Fool Me Once

by nomoreflannel



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Arin still is, Closeted Character, Dan isn’t in Game Grumps, Exes, Heartbreak, M/M, Maybe Forgiveness, Reunions, Starts as a College AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-04 19:56:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20476652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nomoreflannel/pseuds/nomoreflannel
Summary: Arin fell in love with someone a long time ago. He did his best to forget him, but could never let go of the pain that man caused. Now he’s back in Arin’s life and he’s asking for a second chance. But how does that old saying go?





	Fool Me Once

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this AU, Dan is three years older than Arin, Arin finished high school and went to the same college as Dan.

It wasn’t as good as usual, but Arin could understand why. Dan’s been super stressed. This was supposed to relieve that, but it didn’t seem to work. Arin catches his breath- “not as good” definitely doesn’t mean bad. He’s kneeling on his folded arms, trying to get them out from under himself without dropping onto the cum-covered towel. Normally, Dan pulls it out from under Arin and helps him clean up but not tonight. A few seconds after Arin came, Dan let go of his hips and pulled away without a word. Arin’s pretty sure he didn’t finish, but isn’t sure if he should ask. Dan’s in the en-suite bathroom now. That bathroom is one of the few plusses of Arin’s tiny dormroom; the other is that it’s at the very end of a half-occupied hallway. This has given him and Dan a lot of privacy, something the socially-awkward Arin and the introverted upperclassman value immensely. But now that Dan is in there, Arin wishes he had nowhere to hide. 

Arin manages to sit up and uses a corner of the towel to wipe off his stomach. He tosses it in the direction of the hamper but doesn’t care where it lands. His room is a semi-packed mess. He’ll be loading up his car this weekend and going home for summer break- well, going home or just going. This unclear future is exactly why Arin wants Dan to be with him right now; he has an important question to ask. 

Arin stares at the bathroom door lost in thought when Dan opens it and meets Arin’s gaze. Dan’s jaw clenches and he busies himself finding his clothes. He pulls on his underwear and T-shirt while Arin tries to figure out how to break the awkward silence.

“Here, put this on,” Dan says as he passes Arin his clothes.

Arin stares at Dan’s outstretched hand. “You know that I like to shower before getting dressed again, so…” Arin trails off, unsure why Dan is changing so much of their post-sex routine. 

His brain wants to call it their “post-love making routine,” but they haven’t actually said the “L-word” yet. Arin’s not sure if that’s what he actually feels; he’s never been in love before, but he knows he cares about Dan deeply and he loves spending time with him, making him laugh, seeing his eyes crinkle when he smiles. Dan’s been staying the night in Arin’s room more often lately and the way his eyes just do that when the first thing he sees after waking up is Arin… there’s nothing like it in the world. Arin can’t get enough of that, which is why he wants to talk to Dan about moving in together. Or at least that was his plan for tonight, until Dan started acting weird.

“I think you should put them on anyway.” Dan’s terse reply makes Arin’s stomach clench. 

“Why? Are we going somewhere?” He asks, getting dressed anyway. At least it gives him a reason not to look at his boyfriend, or friend, or best friend, or whatever… they’d agreed labels don’t really matter. 

“I am and you know that,” Dan zips his jeans as punctuation and shoves his hands into his pockets.

Arin stops mid-way through lacing his drawstring pants and searches Dan’s face for an explanation. “Is that what this is about? You’re freaked out about graduating, yeah I know,” he lets the frustration touch his voice, “what I don’t get is why you’re taking it out on me?”

“What’s that supposed to mean? I’m not ‘taking it out’ on you. I’m allowed to be freaked out.”

“Yeah, but I’m trying to be supportive.“

“Your support means nothing to me. I barely passed my finals, I have no job waiting for me, my parents think being a musician is a stupid non-career, and now you’re acting like a whiny little bitch.”

“WOW. What the fuck, Dan?!” Arin shouts, “Where the fuck is this coming from?”

“It’s coming from having a naive freshman clinging to me! You knew what this was and now you- you fucking want to follow me to New York! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Dan yells back, high and shrill in Arin’s ears. 

Arin feels his cheeks get hot with anger and embarrassment. “How did you know I was going to talk to you about that?” He asks, barely keeping his voice from shaking. 

“You were talking in your sleep. You were dozing off while I was telling you how expensive rent is in New York and how scare- how much there was to figure out about moving there and then you fucking said, ‘I’ll go with you. Let’s live there together.’ I should’ve known you’d get too attached,” Dan scoffs.

“Oh, I’m attached? You’re kidding me, right? You’re the one who always texts me to hang out. You started sleeping over without me offering first, remember that? Huh? You even begged to come over all those times during your panic attacks, running across campus just for me to hold y-“ 

That’s when Arin finds himself shoved against a wall, Dan’s fists clenched in his shirt. “You shut the FUCK UP!” Dan yells just centimeters away from Arin’s face, desperation and fury taking over his features. He just as suddenly lets go of Arin and takes a step back, catching his breath. Arin’s heart is racing. He’s not afraid that Dan will hit him. He’s not the type to get so angry, it’s completely out of character for the chill, big-hearted person he is. Dan is sensitive though and Arin knows he touched a nerve, so he is afraid of what Dan’ll say next. Despite all of their shouting and spiteful words, Arin still hopes against hope that this is stress, this is just a small fight, that they can work this out.

“I’m sorry, Danny. I didn’t mean to say all of those things. I just, um, I care about you so much… and I know you care about me, too. This school isn’t for me, I’m not planning on coming back in the fall, so I thought, you and I…” Arin can’t bring himself to say it as Dan’s mocking words from before flood his mind. 

Silence hangs in the air for a minute. When Dan speaks, there’s no cruelty, just a cold distance. “There is no ‘you and I.’ This was always just sex to me. I thought we both understood that since we only saw each other in private. I’m sorry I made you believe it was something more. It’s not.” His tone turns icier, “I’m not gay like you. I don’t want a boyfriend. I don’t want you. Good-bye, Arin, good luck with, whatever.” Dan grabs his keys off of Arin’s cluttered desk and wrenches open the door, walking out of Arin’s room without another glance. 

“Danny, no…” Arin whispers barely loud enough for even his own ears to register as he watches the person he knows he loves walk out of his life. He hears the distant sound of the heavy stairwell door slamming closed and that’s when the tears come. He collapses on the floor and cries until he’s sobbing dry. 

Memories of the last five months flash through his mind. The things that made him smile now make acid rise in his throat. Them playing video games and laughing, Dan playing CDs from his favorite bands and teaching him Magic, Arin showing Dan his animations and manga collection, Dan singing for him, sometimes even singing him to sleep... But of course, all of that was in the privacy of their rooms. Dan was right, they were never together in public for too long, he even rarely went to Dan’s suite. He’d made the excuses that he didn’t like to be around people, that his suite mates were obnoxious. They’d never talked about the fact that Dan wasn’t out and Arin was. Once upon a time, Arin had thought that Dan was different because Arin being gay didn’t bother him in their friendship. Then things turned physical between them when Dan had initiated it with a kiss. The thought of their first kiss makes the tears come again. Arin feels so stupid. They didn’t kiss that often, usually only during foreplay. They didn’t do a lot of things, now that Arin thought about it. Dan never prepped Arin for sex, saying that he was afraid to hurt him. He’d never given Arin a blowjob, claiming he had a very sensitive gag reflex. He’d never hold Arin or let Arin hold him unless it was after he came or a panic attack. 

Arin trembles as the realization sets in. “He was using me. I was just a body to him, something to do out of curiosity, a last hurrah before going into the real world. I really am naive, I should’ve known what this was. I can’t believe I let myself fall for him. How could I be so dumb? I thought he cared about me, but if that was true, how could he be so cruel?...He fucked me then he left me. I’m so stupid, of course he doesn’t want me, who would?”

After the shaking subsides, the emptiness settles deep in his chest. Arin pulls himself off the ground after what feels like hours. He throws his clothes and the first few things he can think of into the already half-filled boxes and suitcases. He carries them out to his car on auto-pilot, leaving everything else in the room. He’s supposed to take his last final tomorrow, but he can’t bring himself to care. Arin gets in the car and peels out of the parking lot, following the road off campus. As he drives away, he swears that he’ll do everything he can to forget Dan and leave him behind, too.


End file.
